31 Nights of Halloween Horror part 2 - Cannibal Ferox aka Make Them Die Slowly

Cannibal Ferox aka Make Them Die Slowly

93 minutes

Dir. Umbero Lenzi

Italy/1981

Banned in 31 countries.  Ladies hold onto your tits and guys hold onto your dicks (or vice versa) because tonight we venture into the Amazon and anything goes (and gets eaten).  This is what happens when Italians go to the jungle, its Cannibal Ferox time.

The Horror genre’s bastard cousin, the cannibal film.  The VHS box labeled it as one of the most violent films ever made.  The opening warns you “there are at least two dozen scenes of barbaric torture and sadistic cruelty graphically shown.”  And while this may excite you, if you are not familiar with the Italian Cannibal genre or the Mondo films that they are an offshoot of, it is probably best you avoid this film and wait for tomorrow night’s entry.  Simply because there are horrendous scenes in this film and most of them feature animals.  And it is not just one animal scene, there are multiple, they are graphic and they are heartless.  And while I do not enjoy these scenes and I am not going to defend them, it is what it is.  This is part of the ugly cannibal genre, it’s real life in the fake jungle.  So, I will not hold it against you if you skip tonight’s movie, it is certainly not for everyone.  But don’t judge, for those of us sticking around, let’s get dirty.

I always felt like Cannibal Ferox was a cheap imitation of Cannibal Holocaust.  While Lenzi may have kick started the genre with Man From Deep River, Holocaust was its peak a year earlier and Ferox just tries to capitalize on the same thing in a more cartoony less gritty way.  Because all Italian movies that are set in the US have to take place in NY, we have the obligatory NY set up of a junkie looking to score, but when he goes to his dealer Mike’s apartment he finds two thugs instead who are also looking for Mike.  Seems Mike stole $100,000 from the mob and split.

Now cut to the good stuff, the Amazon jungle.  The reason we are here is an Anthropologist, Gloria is writing her thesis to prove that Cannibalism doesn’t and never has existed.  She is accompanied by her brother Rudy a photographer, and their friend Pat who is just along for the ride, thinking they are going someplace more exotic and vacation-y.  When their jeep gets stuck in the mud they have to hoof it on foot, that is when they run into, you guessed it, Mike played superbly by Giovanni Lombardo Radice aka John Morghen and his wounded friend Joe.  Turns out they are on the run from a cannibal tribe so they all get together to find the river and escape.  We soon learn that Mike is a cocaine addicted dickhead and they are more or less on the run because of what HE did to the Indian tribe and not what they did to Joe and Mike.

But we are not here for the story, we were promised gut munching and god damn we want to see some guts munched.  By today’s standards Cannibal Ferox is hardly the most violent film ever made, but in the VHS days with a box that declared it was and it was banned in 31 countries this was as good as we were going to get.  For many, Cannibal Ferox was our entry to the wild world of the Italian Cannibal film.  Cannibal Holocaust was not available at my video store, nor was Eaten Alive, Cannibal Apocalypse might have been and Jungle Holocaust and Cannibal were, but both are much tamer then what Cannibal Ferox offered.

Animal cruelty aside, does Cannibal Ferox deliver the red stuff?  Well, there is a cannibal eating giant bug larvae, could be real, either way fucking gross, guy gets attacked by Piranha, numerous cannibals caught in spiked traps, guy gets his hand cut off and the crème de la crème, Giovanni get his genitals cut off and they are eaten, chick gets giant hooks strung through her tits and is hung by them and again poor Giovanni (Italy’s whipping boy) gets the top of his head cut off and cannibals feast on his brain, oh and of course there is the arbitrary gut munching which looks to be real enough organs to me.  The rest of the sauce is a step up from a HG Lewis film, but it is spilled a plenty.

So, what we have here is a movie with inane dialogue, people are repeatedly called “Shitface” and “Twat”.  Horrendous acting, Giovanni hams up the character of Mike ridiculously, and the NY subplot which has the police traveling to the Amazon to find Mike only to simply return home as soon as they get there is a complete time filler.  The sad looking Indian tribe covered in white paint looks like they have no idea what is going on, they are just waiting for the cameras to stop rolling so they can get their ham sandwich as payment.  You can’t beat the Columbian shooting location though and the gore is enough to applaud over.  Another stand out for me is the soundtrack even though some of it was previously used in Lenzi’s Eaten Alive.  Written and performed by Roberto Donait and Fiamma Maglione but credited under the alias Budy Maglione, they really did a great job making memorable music and really set the tone for the ominous jungle and the city in the late 70s/early 80s.  And as for Director Umberto Lenzi, he made his mark on violent Italian cinema, but it is Cannibal Ferox for which he is most known for and where he peaked.

It’s safe to uncover your eyes now, we are leaving the jungle and on to fairer pastures tomorrow night, where we explore the nefarious dealings of a notorious doctor.